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Aligned Signs Blog - Astrology, Dating, Horoscope, Love

Decoding Body Language: Subconscious Signals Your Sharing

Decoding Body Language: Subconscious Signals Your Sharing

By Aligned Signs (1067 words)
Posted in Relationships on March 19, 2015

There are (1) comments permalink


Long before early humans developed spoken languages, they managed to communicate with each other. Those cues are still embedded in the subconscious mind, and once you know how to use them…it’s like learning a whole new way to connect!

The brain’s limbic system is responsible for reacting immediately, before rational thought, making your nose wrinkle when you smell something bad or making you smile when you see a puppy. Once you can recognize these cues, it’s almost like reading someone’s mind.

Sometimes, a body language cue can be ambiguous or confusing. Is she blinking a lot because she’s nervous, or are her eyes just dry? That’s why it’s important to look for cues in clusters. One cue may mean nothing, but when you see someone exhibiting 3 or more cues at once, you can pretty safely bet on how they’re feeling.

First, let’s talk about eye contact. After all, eyes are the window to the soul! Paying attention to eye {#/pub/images/17237329_s.jpg}contact is key. Someone who is hiding something or feels uncomfortable may tend to blink frequently, and shift eye contact, avoiding your gaze. Additionally, people tend to glance downwards while lying or fabricating, while glancing upwards occurs when they’re trying to recall a memory. Similarly, you can tell if someone’s smile is authentic by paying attention to their eyes – a sincere smile will always reach the eye muscles, whereas a fake one might not.  Consistent eye contact is a sign that someone is trying to connect with you, and it’s also a great way to show someone that you’re interested in what they have to say! Eye contact of 3 seconds or longer displays interest, and 5 seconds or more of contact becomes flirtatious or romantic. If you’re romantically interested in someone, the “triangle gaze” has been shown to be a powerful tool. First, you gaze into the person’s left eye, then their right, and then down to their lips before back up to their eyes, holding each glance just a little bit longer. This communicates a powerful attraction!

Let’s move on to the lips and mouth. If eyes are the windows to the soul, the lips are the front door.  You know the basics: smile = happy, frown = sad, scowl = angry. But, more subtle motions of the lips can{#/pub/images/9836939_s.jpg} expose more subtle emotions. Tight, pursed lips indicate disagreement or indecision, as does a tensed jaw.  A protruding lower lip usually means displeasure or offense – while not as obvious as a child’s pout, this microexpression can be spotted in adults as well. “Swallowing” the lips (when both lips are curled under between the teeth) is often an extreme reaction to stress or anger, similar but more intense than when the lips are pressed tightly together. Lip biting is a tension reliever, and is seen when someone is feeling stressed. Lip licking isn’t quite as straightforward, though – licking the lips may mean either nervousness or sexual attraction. A sexually charged lip lick will start slowly at the corner of the upper lip and continue to the lower lip, emphasizing the plumpness and color. A nervous lip lick is more of a self comforting gesture, and tends to be much quicker and only partially covering the lips. Again, be on the lookout for clusters here! A lip lick accompanied by intense eye contact and the triangle gaze is a good sign, but a lip lick with a shifting, darting glance and lips pressed close together means something else entirely. 

Finally, the hands and feet. Hands are one of the most expressive and advanced parts of the human body, and people tend to forget to be aware of their feet – so you can learn a lot by paying attention to {#/pub/images/27857073_s.jpg}the limbs and extremities.  Crossed arms mean that someone is closed off, insecure, and unwilling to open up; the hands or arms clasped behind the back mean just the opposite. With the chest area exposed, it shows fearlessness and self confidence.  A wide stance is another indicator of confidence, but it can also show an unwillingness to “bend” or change opinion.  Clenched hands, while sometimes intended to show respect or self assurance, are actually more indicative of restraint, nervousness, frustration, or other negative emotions. When on a date, keep an eye on what your date is doing with their hands. Repetitive gestures like drumming, tapping, or rubbing means that they’re feeling bored. But if instead they’re using their hands to gesture, and especially to touch you conversationally (brushing the arm or shoulder, squeezing the upper arm for emphasis), it’s a strong way of showing interest and engagement. When a person is shifting their weight from foot to foot, they’re subconsciously trying to escape from the situation or conversation, and standing with the legs crossed is a closed or defensive stance, showing that they won’t be leaving with you anytime soon. When standing normally, note the position of the feet. A person’s feet tend to point towards what they’re most interested in, so if they’re pointing towards you – good sign! Towards the door, not so good. This can be especially useful when chatting in groups.

When you’re looking to make a good impression with body language, mirroring is usually a good bet. Mirroring is simply copying the body language of the person you’re interacting with. Humans tend to do this naturally when engaged in positive conversation, and it sends the message that you are on the same wavelength. If they’re leaning forward, you lean forward as well, and so on. This helps make someone feel more comfortable with you without even realizing!

These tools can be a great help when communicating with friends, co-workers and romantic interests. Pay enough attention, and you’ll soon realize that people have plenty to tell you without saying a word!


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Comments (1)

omran posted on: November 16, 2018

thank you

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